“Half of the cure is realizing that you are not alone, that this ‘illness’ actually exists like any other physical illness; you are not making it up and you are not some self-indulgent, self-obsessed narcissist who’s looking for pity or an excuse not to show up to work or school.”—Ruby Wax (Sane New World)
“1. Get more sleep
2. Drink more water
3. Get more exercise
4. Read more
5. Get more organized
6. Clean more often
7. Explore more
8. Relax more
9. Have more patience
10. Be happy”—(via wewillbefitandhealthy)
“Beauty is not long hair, skinny legs, tanned skin or perfect teeth. Beauty is the face of who cried and now smiles, beauty is the scar on your knee since you fell when you were a kid, beauty is the circles when love doesn’t let you sleep, beauty is the expression on the face when the alarm rings in the morning, it’s the melted makeup when you have a shower, it’s the laughter when you make a joke you’re the only one who can understand, beauty is meeting his gaze and stopping understanding, beauty is your gaze when you see him, it’s when you cry for all you paranoias, beauty is the lines marked by time. Beauty is what we feel in the inside which also shows outside us. Beauty is the marks the life leaves on us, all the kicks and the caresses the memories leave us. Beauty is letting yourself live.”—Emma Watson
“Ten Steps on Loving a Girl with Anxiety:
Step 1. Her fears are very much real to her, never say that they aren’t.
Step 2. Don’t tell her to think positive, because sometimes she can only think of the worst possibility that could happen.
Step 3. Never tell her that she’s “overreacting” during an attack, because the anxiety gives her no other choice.
Step 4. Face to face confrontation isn’t always the best idea. If she doesn’t want to meet up, leave her be and don’t get mad.
Step 5. Don’t ever, EVER, tell her that you understand how she feels, because odds are, you don’t.
Step 6. Blaming her for having anxiety is never okay, no matter how mad you are or even if you don’t mean it. She didn’t choose to be this way.
Step 7. Don’t leave her alone because if you do, all she’s left with are her thoughts.
Step 8. Tell her things are going to be okay, because even though it’s not always true, it’ll give her some hope.
Step 9. Don’t make her confront her fears if she doesn’t want to. Sometimes it’s only going to make it worse.
Step 10. Love her. Love everything about her, especially her bad side. Because sometimes all she needs is for you to hold her hand and make her feel like she is worth more than her disorder, because she is.”—a.m.n.
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.”—Elisabeth Kübler-Ross (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
“We have experienced some of the worst situations that life can throw at one person. Public and private ridicule, expulsion from family, accusations of lying and laziness, taking a free ride and probably the worst, our loved ones and friends have forsaken us. Who else do you know would still be standing as we are, not many, I assure you! We are articulate, insightful, compassionate, and opinionated. We are firm in our resolve to either beat this affliction or live with it peacefully. We are strong!”—A positive side to Agoraphobia [x]
“Ever hear a really good joke about Polio? Or made a casual reference to someone having Hepatitis? Or maybe you teased your buddy by saying he has Muscular Dystrophy?
Of course you’ve never done that, because you are not a terrible person! You would never make fun of someone for having a physical illness, but folks make all kinds of offhand remarks about people with mental illnesses without giving it a second thought.”—Hank Green x
I just starting taking classes at a new school. I don't know anyone and every time I've seen someone interesting that I wanted to talk to, I've started to feel very anxious and I just end up being by myself. Everyone seems very nice, I'm just not brave enough to initiate conversation, and I'm starting to feel that, since no one else is initiating conversation with me, they just don't want to talk to me. What do I do?
Starting new classes can be nerve wracking but once you settle in it may get easier. They might be just as nervous as you are, you never know! Start talking about little things, ask a question about the class maybe, or complement their appearance, you may like the shoes they’re wearing, or their hair style. Take it one step at a time, there’s no rush! Message me how it goes, sorry for the lateness of this reply. I hope this helps :)
“Your brain is wired for survival, not happiness. That is why it keeps bringing up negative emotions, past mistakes and worries about the future. Because of this wiring, you can get stuck in repetitive cycles of self-criticism, worry and fear that interfere with your ability to enjoy the present moment.”—Why anxiety is so hard to manage (via tywin)
The thing that sucks about mental illness is that if you aren’t depressed enough, suicidal enough, bad enough, nobody cares. Nobody cares until you reach their standard, and that standard is when your problem is bad enough to effect them
The amount of people who can relate to this makes me equally incredibly sad and immensely angry
1. Cut your hair every now and then. Fresh starts are always nicer than you think. Who needs split ends anyways.
2. Pick a song you really like. Listen to that song a lot. And I mean a lot. Dance around your room naked to that song, beat the song lifeless till it annoys the hell out of you. Then pick a new song and go through the same process. We all need to really hear music, we need to understand what the song we are listening to is really about.
3. Paint your toes black, make it as perfect as possible. Then, scratch it off. Remember nothing is permanent.
4. Go on a run with your dog. Try to race him and beat him. Realize you can out run many things. Then go back and pet your dog, realize that some things you need to go back for.
5. Decorate a plain backpack. Glue on sparkles, glitter, diamonds, newspaper and magazine clippings, lace & ribbon, anything else that may fancy you. Remember, you don’t have to be the same person you were a minute ago.
6. Buy some pretty lights and string them up in your room. Turn off all the lights except for one when you go to bed. Remember it isn’t always dark and lonely. Change your perspective.
7. Lay outside one night. Breathe in breathe out. Accept that you are only one person and cannot do everything at one time. You can take your time. The creator of the stars you’re looking up at did not do it all in one day. Pace yourself.
8. Get up every morning and stand in front of the mirror. Naked, fully clothed, backwards, upside down, who cares how, just do it. Observe yourself. Notice the wrinkles under your eyes from laughing a lot. Count your freckles. Admire your ass. Then name 3 things you love about yourself. You need to love yourself.
”—Tips from Blossite on how to be okay with yourself. (via blossite)
“It may be safer, warmer and more comfortable, always living on the inside looking out, but after a while, the sound of the rain is just not enough anymore; you forget how it feels. And though you may never forget who you are, if you stay away from the world too long, you are guaranteed to forget who you were meant to be. Without others you will lose yourself.”—adam stanley Still Life with Plastic Roses (via iamadamstanley)
How can i fix my friendship with my bestfriend? After my anxiety started i departed. And i can see that she gave up on me. Shes hanging on with other friend now. We are still in touch but not as much as we used to. I talked to her a long ago about my problem but i could she that she could understand me as much i needed. I text her now and then. She is the kind of person that calls people everyday and talk. Me on the other hand i dont and that why shes a bit angry with me. Am i too selfish!??
Firstly, sorry for the lateness of this reply it was buried under messages from other blogs. It’s common for people with anxiety to feel guilty if their relationships deteriorate. It’s hard for people to understand what you’re going through. I think one of the best things you can do is explain to her how hard it is for you, if she really is your friend she’ll be understanding towards your situation. Also try to show how much you appreciate her, invite her over, spend the day together maybe. You’re not selfish, everyone has different ways of keeping in touch with their friends, some have a more relaxed approach but that doesn’t make them any less a friend. A lot of people leave your life when you’re dealing with something like this but the friends that stick by you when you’re dealing with mental health problems will be there forever, it’s hard for them too so remember not to take them for granted. I hope this helps, message me anytime, sorry for taking so long to reply!
Mentally ill people are not the problem. Inaccessible, unaffordable health care is the problem. Stigma is the problem. Lack of treatment is a problem. Lack of understanding is the problem. Lack of compassion is the problem. Not taking people seriously is the problem. Lack of honest conversation and open dialogue is a problem. Using jails as a housing facility for mentally ill persons is a problem. Do you understand me. Mentally ill people are not the problem.
She let go. Without a thought or a word, she let go. She let go of the fear. She let go of the judgments. She let go of the confluence of opinions swarming around her head. She let go of the committee of indecision within her. She let go of all the ‘right’ reasons. Wholly and completely, without hesitation or worry, she just let go.
She didn’t ask anyone for advice. She didn’t read a book on how to let go. She didn’t search the scriptures. She just let go. She let go of all of the memories that held her back. She let go of all of the anxiety that kept her from moving forward. She let go of the planning and all of the calculations about how to do it just right.
She didn’t promise to let go. She didn’t journal about it. She didn’t write the projected date in her Day-Timer. She made no public announcement and put no ad in the paper. She didn’t check the weather report or read her daily horoscope. She just let go.
She didn’t analyze whether she should let go. She didn’t call her friends to discuss the matter. She didn’t do a five-step Spiritual Mind Treatment. She didn’t call the prayer line. She didn’t utter one word. She just let go.
No one was around when it happened. There was no applause or congratulations. No one thanked her or praised her. No one noticed a thing. Like a leaf falling from a tree, she just let go.
There was no effort. There was no struggle. It wasn’t good and it wasn’t bad. It was what it was, and it is just that.
In the space of letting go, she let it all be. A small smile came over her face. A light breeze blew through her. And the sun and the moon shone forevermore.
You are allowed to grieve the years you lost to mental illness. You’re allowed to be mad that it happened to you. You’re allowed to pine after the person you might have been had it been different. But don’t let that get in the way of your growing into your new self and following a wholly new path for your life.
I am not lazy and say that I am anxious to get out of doing any work, contributing to conversations or missing the party you want me to attend. I would really like to do these things but sometimes my anxiety makes me feel paralyzed and unable to do things you take for granted. Anxiety is not an excuse. Believe me, I would rather be able to attend a party and enjoy myself than sit home feeling like a failure.”—Eileen Bailey (7 Things Anxiety Sufferers Would Like Their Family & Friends to Know)
“Depression is such a cruel punishment. There are no fevers, no rashes, no blood tests to send people scurrying in concern. Just the slow erosion of the self, as insidious as any cancer. And, like cancer, it is essentially a solitary experience. A room in hell with only your name on the door.”—Unknown (via noirdunuit)
After a long time i decieded to visit a phsycologist and i will start on september. I went to one session only. He told me that he can help me and that he understood my problem(anxiety and a bit od dpd-i thought i was depersonalised but when he told me that im not-its anxiety, some dpd symptoms,obbsesion)i waited a lot of time bc i thought i could do this on my own but it seems i can. The problm is that only by the idea of going to the doctor i get stressed and i fear that i nothing will change.
Not doing something about your problem will get you nowhere. Actually having the motivation to do something about your situation takes a lot and you’re more likely to get the outcome you desire by seeing a doctor, then not going at all. Fear is a terrible thing but you can’t let it stop you from getting better, do not give it the power. Please, go to the doctor. Seeing a professional should make a difference, even if you don’t believe it will. Message me anytime :)
I have an anxiety disorder, it used to be severe. In the last year I've gotten a lot better and have been quite okay with a job (I have 2 but in 1 job I struggle with anxiety) I found out that my boss told one coworker that I am scared of her (it's not true). That coworker then went on to tell me she once worked in mental health, that I should be able to work in spite of my anxiety and I have a bad work ethic. Is she right? I feel like my progress has been for nothing, if I shouldn't be working.
Sorry for the lateness of this reply. I didn’t really understand the message, is this person saying that your anxiety shouldn’t stop you working? Because that’s wrong, sometimes when a persons anxiety is really bad it can disrupt their work. You have an illness, an actual medical condition, anxiety is not a bad work ethic. Obviously this coworker of yours left her job because of her complete ignorance towards mental illness. Sadly, some people will think these things, they’ll think you’re lazy or are just faking it. Don’t give these people your time of day, there’s no point in worrying about them. Sadly most of them are so narrow minded that it doesn’t matter how well you explain whats going on inside your body they still won’t believe you. Your progress is something, don’t let these people get you don’t, don’t let them take away your achievements. Little achievements to them may be major achievements to you but that doesn’t take away their significance. Keep going with your job, things should get easier, I have faith in you! I hope this helps, message me anytime :)
I was wondering if you have any advice for me. Basically, my anxiety has hit an all time high. I'm not diagnosed with an anxiety disorder but I'm absolutely certain I'm suffering from one. And I can not leave the house without another person or with my phone in my hand. I can't stare at where I'm walking because I'll notice other humans walking or driving past and it terrifies me. I am frightened of just being in the world I live in. (Continued)
Apologies for the lateness of this reply. It does sound like this is becoming a pretty big problem in your life. My advice is get yourself to a doctor and get properly diagnosed. If you want to fix this, this is the first step. Tell your parents, though I’m sure they’re aware something is wrong if it’s disrupting your life this much, and get yourself checked by your doctor. I hope the doctors goes alright, and remember you’re not alone, you will get through this! Message me anytime :)
I am a bit terrified by cinemas ... I think because my first panick attack happened in a cinema. So my friends are planning to go and i want to go as well but i hesitate a bit and i think that if i go something is going to happen.
Firstly sorry for the lateness of this reply I’ve been extremely busy and I’ve also been getting a lot of questions, not just from this blog. Avoiding a place that triggers anxiety is not beneficial for you in the long run. The more you avoid it the harder it will be to go back there, it could get to a point were you can’t go there at all. When anxiety starts to limit the places you can go it can cause you to become anxious in places you never were before. Not to say that will happen to you, but it can happen. Take the bull by the horns as they say and go to the cinema, try and enjoy yourself! You’ll feel better once you have done it and it should ease your anxiety the next time you go. I have faith in you! Message me how it goes :)
Hi guys, just a quick heads up that I’ll be taking a short hiatus. I’m extremely busy at the moment and can’t answer your questions as quickly as I’d like to. I’ll answer all the questions already in my ask box at the moment, and you can still message me but your questions will take longer to get to. I’m setting up a que as well so it’ll be like I was never gone and I’ll be in and out of Tumblr so if you desperately need my help we can chat. Hope you’re all having a lovely summer, feel free to message me if you have questions regarding this matter! :)
I'm extremely suicidal. I've been in a mental hospital twice for manic depression. Everyone at school looks at me like I'm a freak. Like I'll put a gun in my mouth in the middle of class or I'll start slashing my wrists in the lunch room. I really don't know what to do anymore. Please help me. Please.
Suicide is not the answer, you need professional help. You can get through this, you can get better and you will get better. Like any other illness you need help from the people who know how to make you better. Please, talk to your family and go to see your doctor immediately. Any advice that I’d give to you wouldn’t be enough. I’m sorry I can’t be of more help, it’s just not in my capability.
I get panic attacks quite often when I'm doing things I enjoy and I am going to warped tour on Friday so I'm terrified I'm going to have one while I'm there and I'll be alone apart from 2 or 3 friends but I am so embarrassed when I get them and I don't want to ruin their day and idk I just don't know what to do
Perhaps have a private word with your friends? Explain to them that you are prone to panic attacks and certain situations can trigger them. Say that you’re looking forward to Warped Tour but panic attacks are out of your control and all you want is their understanding and patience if one occurs while you’re there. Worrying about ruining their day is only going to stress you out more. Remember, you’re not a burden to your friends. Also remember that if you do have a panic attack that that’s all it is, a panic attack. Keep telling yourself that if you start to panic and concentrate on anything other than worrying. Keep your mind occupied, there should be lots of things to keep you distracted at Warped Tour! I hope the last statement isn’t too contradictory, I hope you understand my example. Lastly, remember to have fun! There’s going to be lots of stuff going on to keep you busy, it may take your mind off panicking. I hope this helps, have a great time and message me how it goes!
Im almost positive that I have anxiety and depression. Some days I just can't do anything, talk to anyone, or even get out of bed. And somedays my head won't stop being a beehive, my thoughts are always negative on these days and they just swirl round and round until I have a breakdown. How would you go about explaining this to family? They often blame my 'nothing' days to laziness and my 'everything at once' days to a bad mood. How do I tell them what I think it is? And that I need help?
Everyone has bad days, but when they become too much for you to handle you have to talk to someone about it. Just sit them down and have a serious talk, try to express how much this is troubling you. You could say while everyone can be lazy, for the main part what you’re going through isn’t and that you’re concerned about your mental health. Perhaps the family member who you get along with the most, the one who understands you the most, maybe telling them first is the best course of action. You don’t need to have a massive family intervention, just the family members who will need to know. Depending on your age you might be able to see a doctor without a family member, perhaps you can get properly diagnosed before talking to them. Remember you do need to see a doctor and telling your family is the first step. You can do this! I hope it goes OK, message me anytime :)
Hello, I'm the same anon with the doctor question. I told her I was very stressed and worried about my school work. My mom was in the room with me so I really wasn't comfortable at all. My doctor suggested dropping one of the AP classes. She said if I get stressed while studying to just stop and do something that relaxes me.(She even suggested crying to get my emotions out!) I didn't tell her about my constant worrying, though. I think the school stress is causing most of my worries.
Crying is actually a really good suggestion! Keeping everything bottled up isn’t healthy at all, having a good cry once and awhile is normal. Minimizing school stress may be the best plan of action. Once you downsize on your workload things might get better, but if they don’t and you keep worrying I suggest telling someone about it, that’s what family is for! I hope you can start to feel more relaxed, message me anytime :)